16 Candles, No Sports Car

1995 Dating - I'm pretty sure just got caught making out in the kitchen at our friends' apartment.

1995 Dating – I’m pretty sure we just got caught making out in the kitchen at our friends’ apartment.

If my marriage was a person, it would be legal to drive today.

There was no sports car with a big red bow in my carport this morning. My trusty Subaru remains on guard, ready for any mom-ish needs. Because that’s just where we are in life.

We’ve been married 16 years. We tried to decide if we’ve managed to accumulate an entire year of days when we were not annoyed at each other at some point. But a year is a long time: 365 days. That’s almost 23 days per year of non-annoyance. Two days per month, every month that we’ve been married? I’m not sure that we’ve had that many days where neither of us was annoyed at the other one at some point. I think we’re going to have to make it to 20 years before we reach the one-full-year mark…maybe longer.

In December you'll see a lovely photo of all of us smiling. But this is the real us. Jackson is being a nut job. Charlie is trying to figure out where it all went wrong for him. I'm cracking up at Charlie for being so annoyed with us. Happy Holidays!

Earlier this year. See, we can’t even take Christmas photos without him wondering how he ended up with this crazy woman.

This is not to say it’s been bad around here. Overall, I’d say we’ve got it pretty good. It’s just that when two flawed, human people live together, well, things don’t go perfectly. Charlie has this wife who will say pretty much anything that pops into her head. When you’re a guy who wants to live a reasonably dignified life, that can get old. I have this husband who does not participate in my HILARIOUS shenanigans, rolls his eyes and sighs a lot. That makes me want to punch him in the throat.

Still, I’m glad it’s him who I’ll get old with. I could be with someone more like me, but I doubt I’d have this much fun. There aren’t a lot of people who get it. He does. That’s nice.

So maybe when the kid goes off to college, we’ll talk sports car. I’m sure it will depend on the gas mileage, the safety rating, resale value, Consumer Reports…

Happy Anniversary, Charlie!


2010 In spite of all of it, we do ok.


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