Tale of a Monkey, a Puppy and the No Fun Mom

Peppy at my desk

Some days Monkey Boy is so adorably sweet and kind he can melt your heart. Yesterday was not one of those days. He acted a fool at school. He got sent home early. He cried while sitting in the chair waiting for Baby Daddy to pick him up. He knew he was in the sauce.

Baby Daddy spanked him. Then when I got home, we wrote apology notes to the aggrieved parties. I never thought I would help my child write a letter that began, “Dear Ben, I’m sorry I threatened your life and punched you in the throat….”

Nobody tells you this before you have a kid, when he’s in the sauce, you get to spend quality time with the principal. Overall, it was an encouraging conversation. Truth is, what happened is not that unusual. He’s four. He has trouble with the concept of social norms. His teacher and the rest of the staff are going to work with us to better set him up for success. I feel good about their take on this. They obviously love that Turkey.

Peppy Rocks Out

Now for the pitiful selfish whining portion: I’m SO PISSED at him for getting in trouble. See, I had this whole plan for a fun night that was RUINT by his antics.

Yesterday morning, he was very concerned his stuffed puppy “Peppy” was lonely during the day. I said, “Oh no, he comes to work with me.” There was stupid round robin that ended with, “Prove it.” So I brought that damn dog to work with me. I took pictures all over the building. My coworkers got in on the action. It was hilarious.

I uploaded all the photos and couldn’t wait to get home so we could look at them together. I just knew he would be so excited to see the Adventures of Peppy. But I couldn’t very well reward the throat-punching. So he didn’t get to see them. We didn’t get to laugh together. I wanted to cry. Here’s hoping for a better day today, so we can try again.

Peppy Wins a Major Award

My parents used to tell me it hurt them worse than it hurt me when they punished me. Usually, I was rubbing a sore backside when they professed this pain and I always thought, “Wanna bet?” But now I get it.

I want to be a fun mom. I want to be a mom who does creative things and makes fabulous memories with her kid. But more than that, I want to be a good mom. I want to teach him right from wrong. I loathe punishments because we all feel the pain. But that’s how it works.

I saw the title of an article a few months back that may be the most true thing I’ve ever read Parenting: All Joy, No Fun.



Filed under Monkey Boy

8 responses to “Tale of a Monkey, a Puppy and the No Fun Mom

  1. i’m not the fun one and i’m okay with that (most days)…he’ll rejoice in Peppy’s day today and he’ll remember why you’re the fun mom

  2. Hold the phone! We have to write apology notes when we threaten throat punches and / or murder? Crap. I’m waaaay behind…

    I love you and that Monkey! You’re both doing better than you think.

  3. Cari

    Totally lovin’ the lava lamp in your office. 🙂

  4. MaryT

    You may not be the “fun” parent right now, but you are absolutely the good parent. Problem is that so many parents want only the fun times and not the difficult responsibility-teaching times. That becomes evident a little later in the game, when they discover that they now house disrepectful, usually lazy teens. And they wonder what happened to the fun. Our sons swear that they were forced to write the entire book of Proverbs during their raising, but actually it was only a few chapters! But it was worth it. Keep up the good work.

  5. I think we’re going to have to start practicing writing those letters….

    Cute puppy!

  6. Karen

    I stand in awe of people who parent well and you are one of those. I agree with Audreya: you’re doing better than you think. (Did you finally get to share the Peppy pictures?)

  7. elz

    I was just talking to a fellow co-working mom about wanting to be “Yes” moms more than “No.” It’s hard because we want to raise our kids right, but we want to let them be kids too. Parenting is hard, especially when the kid part interferes with the fun part.

    I still think the apology notes are kind of hilarious!

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