In a development that is not at all surprising, I have been accused of passing on poor values to Monkey Boy for, among other infractions, failing to waller around in Christmas garland. To most critics, I offer the simple explanation of: Bite Me.
However I think it’s only fair to say, I do believe this holiday has three redeeming qualities. Since lists seem to be appropriate for the season, and again, it’s my blog so I can do whatever I want, here’s the 3 reasons the Christmas season hasn’t yet killed me.
1) Absurdity: There is something about the holiday season between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day that causes people to just get silly. I am not referencing poor, often career limiting, decisions made at company Holiday parties. I mean people being overcome with an unconventional Christmas spirit that has no clear basis in logic. I like it. I like it a lot.
2) Cards: I actually really like Christmas cards. I like getting them and sending them. I like the creativity that goes into these expressions of kindness. (Yes, I have some of both creativity and kindness in me.) I also like the Christmas Card competition that exists pretty much only in my mind. Whoever gets their cards out first, wins! It’s important to clarify that there are rules to this contest, as all civilized societal activities demand. Cards cannot go out before December 1. That’s a false start in clear violation of the calendar order of holidays. All cards must have some hand written component to them. So you cannot slap printed address labels on your printed cards and call it good. All cards must somewhere have YOUR NAME on them. One would think this was learned in primary school, but not so much. I couldn’t care less what salutation they bring: Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, Happy Holidays, whatever makes your heart happy, send it. I’ll receive it with gratitude.
3) Selected Movies: There are two Christmas movies, which have become part of the tradition for our family and I like them. I watch Miracle on 34th Street the day after Thanksgiving. I watch It’s a Wonderful Life on Christmas Eve. Somewhere in the middle, I try to work in White Christmas and Christmas Story, but they are not required viewing. These movies generally make me feel good about my life, which keeps me from hanging people by tinsel when they criticize how little faux Christmas spirit I bring into my home.
For genuine Christmas spirit, you need hot chocolate, George Bailey, Zu Zu’s petals and a bell ringing because Clarence got his wings.
And a leg lamp never hurts.