So I went to the orthodontist AGAIN, yesterday. This whole process was supposed to take 13 months. 16 months later, there's no end in site. Every time I'm there they say, we're really close. Obviously not.
So he said for me to come back in five weeks, which had me bolt upright out of the chair because I told him the baby was due in three weeks and I did not intend to look like a teen mom in the bring-the-baby-home photos. He looked at me like I was an alien when I reminded him of this fact. He said, you were serious when you said that? Clearly this man has no idea the depth of my vanity. I tried desperately to look serious and stern with wires sticking out of my mouth when I informed him that I was entirely serious.
He told me I could have the braces off when I brought the baby home, or he could finish straightening my teeth. But I couldn't have both. Nothing like a choice that stinks. But I decided I hadn't come this far to quit now. So photo shop better work as well as advertised. My kid is going to be ready for braces by the time these finally come off.
And there's no need to send me emails to tell me I sound bitter about this. I know I'm Bitter Betty…. with braces.